Our rules

Who can join

• Adults only. You must be 18 or older. Accounts we believe belong to someone under 18 are removed straight away.
• One account, the real you. Use your real first name, age and photos. No fake profiles, no accounts for someone else, no businesses or agents.
• Single and sincere. Be honest about your relationship status, whether you have children and what you are looking for.
• Women meet men, men meet women. Discover shows members of the opposite gender.

How we treat each other

• Be kind, even when you're not interested. A polite "I don't think we're a match" is always better than insults or silence after a date.
• No harassment. No threats, bullying, pressure, repeated messages after someone has said no, or sexual messages that weren't welcome.
• No hate. Nothing that attacks people for their tribe, religion, gender, disability or background.
• Respect "no". If someone unmatches, blocks or doesn't reply, let it go. Don't contact them another way.

Sharing phone numbers and contacts

Most romance scams begin with "let's move to WhatsApp". Once a chat leaves SeekMyHeart, our safety warnings, reports and blocking can't protect you. So contact details wait until you've really got to know each other.

1. 10 days have passed since you matched.
2. You chatted on at least 6 different days — days you both sent a message. Missing a day doesn't reset anything.
3. You both tap "I'm happy to share contact details" in your chat. Either of you can say "not yet".

What counts as contact details: phone numbers however they are written (digits, words like "zero eight zero…", Pidgin, Yoruba, Igbo or Hausa numbers, or split over several messages), WhatsApp and Telegram links, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, Facebook and other social handles, email addresses and website links. Photo messages also wait for this point.

If you try to send contact details too early, the message isn't sent and we show you how far along you are. Your chat shows the countdown at the top. Repeated attempts are reviewed by our team.

No plan unlocks this earlier — your safety isn't for sale. Contact details are never allowed in profiles, group posts or the Book Club.

Money and scams

• Never send money to someone you met online — not for transport, data, a sick relative, a visa, an investment or anything else. Real love doesn't ask.
• Never ask for money, gifts, gift cards, airtime or crypto. Asking is a reason for removal.
• No selling. No business offers, investment schemes, loans or "opportunities".
• SeekMyHeart will never ask for your password, card PIN or one-time codes.

Photos and your profile

• Your own, recent photos, with your face clearly visible in your main photo. No photos of other people, celebrities or children on their own.
• Nothing explicit or violent, in photos, video intros or messages.
• Photos are reviewed by our team, and video introductions are approved before anyone sees them.
• No contact details in your name, bio, prompts or photos.

Groups and the Book Club

• Disagree with ideas, not people. Keep discussions friendly and on topic.
• No spoilers in the Book Club outside the week they belong to.
• Moderators may remove posts and pause posting for members who break the rules.
• Messages still need a match. Liked someone's post? Like their profile — if they like you back, you can chat.

Meeting in person

• Meet in a busy public place for the first few dates, and arrange your own transport.
• Use the date safety check-in: share your plan with a trusted friend, who is alerted if you don't check in afterwards.
• Trust your instincts. You can leave any date at any time, and you can always report someone.
• In an emergency, call 112.

Reporting and what happens next

Report anyone who breaks these rules — from their profile, a message, or a group post. Reports are private and are reviewed by people, not ignored by machines.

1. A warning for a first, minor problem.
2. A suspension for repeated or more serious problems.
3. A permanent ban for scams, asking for money, threats, explicit content without consent, fake identities or anyone under 18.

You can appeal any decision through Support.

Your privacy

• Your exact birthday, location and contact details are never shown.
• Sensitive answers (faith, ethnicity, genotype, intimacy questions) follow your own privacy choices — genotype and intimacy answers are never shown to anyone.
• Don't screenshot or share other members' photos or messages outside SeekMyHeart.
• You can hide your profile, go incognito, download your data or delete your account at any time.